I have been cast in a production of "Harvey".

The part I will be playing is that of Wilson, the "sanitarium strongarm".

I've started doing push-ups, because while I am indeed "black-browed", I am not quite "burly".

I will devote the rest of this entry to Lore Sjöberg-style ratings of other famous Wilsons.

Mr. Wilson from Dennis the Menace: You have to feel sorry for this guy. He works his ass off for years to support himself and his wife, and he finally gets to retire and spend the rest of his days in peace and quiet. Or so he thinks - then along comes this insidious evil force in the form of a child. Unfortunately, the bumbling exaggeration of Mr. Wilson in the Dennis the Menace cartoon - possibly the worst cartoon ever made - has forever tainted this character in my eyes. B-

Wilson from Home Improvement: See, it's funny, because we never see his mouth! C

Woodrow Wilson: He was a President. If I remember correctly, he was a pretty good President, too. At least, he didn't kill thousands of Native Americans, which puts him in the top 75%. Also, his term is now sufficiently in the past so that he can be used for old people jokes (i.e. "What did your mom say to Woodrow Wilson? 'Get off my lawn, kid!'") A-