Talking with Jenn makes me feel smart in ways that school never did.

I am apparently "classically elegant" as opposed to "high fashion", where "classically elegant" means "hopelessly outmoded" and "high fashion" means "looks like a douchebag".

The most annoying form of humor is the pun. The second most annoying is jokes of the form " makes look like !" where all three names are flash-in-the-pan celebrities that the entertainment press is desperately trying to make me care about. Example: "Paris Hilton makes Jessica Simpson look like Jimmy Fallon!" Taking an overplayed pop song and rewriting the lyrics to be about celebrities would be up there too, except that they weren't even trying to be funny.

As we get older, the concept of a "snow day" is replaced by the concept of "getting to work and realizing you're the only sucker who bothered to come in."